The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old
by Harvey Karp, Paula Spencer
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Book Summary Information
Author: Harvey Karp, Paula SpencerEdition: Paperback
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 2005-05-31
ISBN: 0553381431
Number of pages: 336
Publisher: Bantam
Book Reviews of The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old
Book Review: Great Resource for Parents!
Summary: 5 Stars
Moving Through Toddler Tantrums
The Happiest Toddler On The Block works by encouraging parents to think of their toddlers as little cavemen. Do you find yourself constantly saying "No!", "How many times do I have to tell you?", "Why aren't you listening to me"?! Dr. Karp explains a new way of thinking about how your little caveman understands communication that will make it easy to avoid tantrums and frustrations for both you and your child! When you have realistic expectations about your child's ability to control their emotions and communications, the easier it will be to get along and lessen daily tantrums.
The Fast Food Rule
On the DVD Dr. Karp will explain how the Fast Food Rule works, by allowing who ever is hungriest for attention to go first when communicating. Much like a drive thru employee, a parent must repeat the child's message back to them before moving on with their own agenda. This does NOT mean the child gets whatever they want, it simply allows you to acknowledge their needs before redirecting them to your agenda.
Speaking Your Child's Language
Another great tool Dr. Karp provides parents is something called, Toddler-ese. Simply put, it's the ability to talk to your child in short, empathetic sentences matching their body language. It's a technique I've used frequently with Luke and it's pretty amazing to see Luke stop his tantrum and look at me like "yeah, she gets what I'm trying to say!" Again, just because he may be throwing a tantrum because he can't go outside doesn't mean I'm going to fold and let him go outside. It means that I can repeat back to him what he wants and then when it's clear that I understand what he wants I can put forth my agenda by saying "Luke, I understand you want to go outside...how about we go play with your cars until it's time for us to go outside."
Definately look into getting the DVD as well, it really helps explain these great techniques!
More The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old reviews:
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Summary of The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old
Toddlers can drive you bonkers?so adorable and fun one minute?so stubborn and demanding the next! Yet, as unbelievable as it sounds, there is a way to turn the daily stream of ?nos? and ?don?ts? into ?yeses? and hugs?if you know how to speak your toddler?s language. In one of the most useful advances in parenting techniques of the past twenty-five years, Dr. Karp reveals that toddlers, with their immature brains and stormy outbursts, should be thought of not as pint-size people but as pintsize?cavemen.Having noticed that the usual techniques often failed to calm crying toddlers, Dr. Karp discovered that the key to effective communication was to speak to them in their own primitive language. When he did, suddenly he was able to soothe their outbursts almost every time! This amazing success led him to the realization that children between the ages of one and four go through four stages of ?evolutionary? growth, each linked to the development of the brain, and each echoing a step in prehistoric humankind?s journey to civilization:
? The ?Charming Chimp-Child? (12 to 18 months): Wobbles around on two legs, grabs everything in reach, plays a nonstop game of ?monkey see monkey do.?
? The ?Knee-High Neanderthal? (18 to 24 months): Strong-willed, fun-loving, messy, with a vocabulary of about thirty words, the favorites being ?no? and ?mine.?
? The ?Clever Caveman? (24 to 36 months):
Just beginning to learn how to share, make friends, take turns, and use the potty.
? The ?Versatile Villager? (36 to 48 months): Loves to tell stories, sing songs and dance, while trying hard to behave.
To speak to these children, Dr. Karp has developed two extraordinarily effective techniques:
1) The ?fast food? rule?restating what your child has said to make sure you got it right;
2) The four-step rule?using gesture, repetition, simplicity, and tone to help your
irate Stone-Ager be happy again.
Once you?ve mastered ?toddler-ese,? you will be ready to apply behavioral techniques specific to each stage of your child?s development, such as teaching patience and calm, doing time-outs (and time-ins), praise through ?gossiping,? and many other strategies. Then all the major challenges of the toddler years?including separation anxiety, sibling rivalry, toilet training, night fears, sleep problems, picky eating, biting and hitting, medicine taking ? can be handled in a way that will make your toddler feel understood. The result: fewer tantrums, less yelling, and, best of all, more happy, loving time for you and your child.
From the Hardcover edition.
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