The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein
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Book Reviews of The Giving Tree
Book Review: A beautiful spiritual lesson
Summary: 5 Stars
It seems many well-intentioned readers are sadly missing the point of this beautiful story. Stop being offended or depressed about this story, dear readers. As Dr Wayne Dyer says, That which offends you only weakens you. It is your ego at work, convincing you that the world shouldn't be the way it is. The tree in the story was not abused at all. This view must be a projection from your own experience. (And I'm sorry if that is so). The tree doesn't have to be female either. Don't take it so literally. The tree is just a symbol of a being who has reached ultimate spiritual beauty and grace. Females often have this quality, naturally (but so do many men). You clearly didn't read the words closely enough, or understand their powerful message. The tree was only truly happy when she gave something of herself to the boy. As St. Francis of Assisi teaches us, It is through giving that we receive. We can only be truly happy when we give of ourselves to others, expecting nothing in return. When we let go of our egos, stop wanting to be admired, and think only of other's needs, we attract true love back to us in return. The boy loved the tree, and that was all the tree needed to be happy.
So many readers have focused on the apparently selfish boy, but the lesson here is not given by the boy, it is given by the tree. (Hence the title). It is the tree who we must try to copy in our lives. The boy represents others around us, who we must love and give selflessly to. The boy actually did nothing inherently wrong. If he had rejected the tree's offers, or the tree's love, that would have been much sadder for the tree. However, he took nothing more than what the tree lovingly and willingly offered to him, and by loving the tree in return, he made the tree truly happy.
Yes, the image of the tree giving away her trunk to the boy, and becoming only a stump at the end, is indeed stunning. The first time I read the book, I had tears streaming down my cheeks. Tears of humility and awe. This story is a breath-taking example of abundant love. It shows us that we are not our bodies or our possessions. Our ego tries to cling to these things, but it will never be satisfied. Our ego can never have enough material things and will always be disgruntled and offended, because our bodies and possessions cannot be controlled. Over time they will age, fade and disappear.. However, who we really are is our spirit, which lies deeper than our bodies and possessions, and is infinite. Our spirits are full of beauty, love and abundance, no matter what happens to our bodies or our possessions. The more we give of our selves and our possessions, the richer, more beautiful and more abundant our spirits become. Then, nothing can truly hurt us, not even losing our limbs.
In giving away nearly everything she had, the tree became a thousand times more spiritually beautiful than she was in her younger days. And only then, as the story says at the end, the tree was happy. Only then did the tree reach true lasting peace and happiness.
It is a lesson for us all, and I'm thrilled to hear that this book is being taught in schools. I have now bought the book for my 2 young children, and intend to teach it to them, so that they may learn how to be selfless, loving and giving, so that their spirits may grow so beautiful and abundant that they will have lasting happiness, no matter what happens in their lives.
Book Review: Sweet, sad story of unconditional love
Summary: 5 Stars
I read this book to my two year old son for the first time a few years ago. The obvious metaphor, that of the tree being a mother whose son is destined to leave her someday, struck me right off. I was tearing up about halfway through. What mother of any child -- male or female -- doesn't secretly dread that far-off event, even while it signals a positive step in the natural order of things? That's a universal theme and part of nearly everybody's life at one time. So maybe it's a little manipulative on that level.After I was done reading my boy bounced up and went into our back yard to play. In passing he actually stopped and hugged the big old pepper tree! At that point I realized a new metaphor for this story, and a deeper level of meaning to it that had touched me as well. You see, the tree also represents God. He loves us from the beginning of our lives and nurtures us with wholesome gifts (represented here by apples and leaves) and we accept this with joy that gives His love right back. Children have that universally satisfying relationship with God even while they may have no name for it. They are able to simply enjoy the truly important things in a way adults have trouble with.
You'll notice that when the boy gets a little older he spends less and less time with the Tree. His growing up signals the start of worldliness and materialism. He comes back as a teenager and asks for money. Then he comes back and asks for a house, and later a boat. The things of the world never truly satisfy him the way fellowship with the Tree did earlier, but it takes a while to realize this. In the end, he recognizes the truth and comes back to the only source of true love and peace he ever really had, and can accept the simple pleasure of sitting with the Tree once again. In the same way, we get distracted by worldly concerns and materialism as adults and tend to stray from God, only to realize after the best years of our life are spent that we should have spent more of them with Him.
God's selfless, unconditional love for His children (and the generally ungrateful attitude we throw right back most of the time) is so poignantly portrayed by this metaphor of the Giving Tree that I think it's better than any metaphor I've found in the bible! In the deepest sense, my tears were in recognition of my own ingratitude and selfishness as contrasted by the love of God. For one small minute, I was able to see the human condition from His perspective and weep for it. That was precious to me, and something I will always have Silverstein to thank for.
I can understand the interpretations of The Giving Tree from an environmental perspective and from a feminist perspective as well, and understand why so many people object to it. Truthfully, we don't really know which of these many messages Shel Silverstein intended, or if he even believed in God or not. But God does work in mysterious ways, and I truly believe He used Shel's work to send a message of His own to those of us who can receive it.
-Andrea, aka Merribelle
Book Review: A negative book with multiple POSITIVE lessons!
Summary: 5 Stars
No, it's not Disney. I think this book has a lot of value. Yes, it does have ADULT THEMES, but that's why I like it: ADULT THEMES FOR CHILDREN. These same themes will come over and over again in your child's life both IN CHILDHOOD and ongoing throughout life. This is certainly not my choice for baby's bedtime story, but I think this book could be read to a 5 year-old and older. If you are intelligent in your use of this book, there is much discussion that you could and should INITIATE about loving and caring about others, not hurting others but putting others first, treating others with kindness and respect, not taking things for granted, how to respond to those who abuse us, love, loneliness, loss, etc.
IF you are not capable of putting this discussion of complicated relations to the level your child will relate to, the book WILL NOT do it for you. I think you could read it to a 5 year-old and then reread it PERIODICALLY as the child gets older and has further ability to understand relationships. I would advise parental discretion: consider the age/maturity of the child and for goodness sake, don't read it every night! Consider that the boy and the tree are NOT having the healthiest of relationships. If your child identifies too much with either the boy or the tree, oh!!! ...Forward years later on the psychoanalyst's couch: "I just don't know why I chase after abusive men. Oh, and at night, I have nightmares that I'm not a real person but instead, I'm sometimes a tree and often a doormat! Why do I feel this way?" ;-) ...
...This book could be used as a springboard to healthy discussions, but the book material itself is NOT something I'd think to replay NIGHTLY in the mind of a child--especially a 2 year-old who can't even begin to put the material into perspective.
This is a great book to use to help you come full circle in your discussions to your children about relationships. Ask your children how they would feel if they were the tree? The boy? How should you act when you care about others? What happens when you want or need someone later and they are no longer there for you because of what you've done? Should you expect someone to stay around if you abuse them? How should you respond if you are friends with someone who is abusing you? If you are not prepared to address these things with your child, you probably should skip over this book. This book could be read at various times throughout childhood. Eventually, most in their late teens/early adulthood will date some dumb jerk and suffer a broken heart. :-( Bring out this book again. They will see who had what role in the relationship and remember the many discussions you had (should have had) about proper handling of relationships--any relationships from friendships to dating relationships to marriage relationships. These prior discussions could be VERY preventive as well.
Book Review: An Excellent Book, Worthwhile for Children and Adults
Summary: 5 Stars
I can remember very distinctly when my grandmother first read me "The Giving Tree," and for nearly a decade afterwards, I, and then my younger sister, would ask to have it read everytime we went in to visit her. Now, almost fifteen years later, I find myself a freshman at Harvard, staring at the books that I find the most significant, fitted snugly between two bookends on my desk. Nestled in between "The Complete Works of Shakespeare" and the rightmost statuette of one of the lions from the New York Public Library rests my grandmother's worn copy of "The Giving Tree," given to me as a going away present.The story is incomparable. It is a tale of unquestioning love and devotion with agapic roots tracing back to the new testament and to ancient Greece. The ideal of sacrifice is ubiquitously honored among the worlds religions: Bhadisatvas sacrifice enlightenment to lead others to Nirvana, Abraham was prepared to sacrifice his son to God, Jesus sacrificed himself for mankind, Jihad is a sacrifice of self for Allah. The tree is entirely self-sacrificial, and thus noble. The boy, by comparison, is no more selfish than any ordinary person, and he is himself ennobled by an innocence that he carries with him throughout the story. He never thinks of the tree, which can be taken to mean "he thinks only of himself," or, "even as a middle aged man, he is too innocent to understand the suffering of others." In reality, however, these are not different interpretations. His innocence leads him to think only of himself, because he is not quite able to understand others. But that is human nature: man is not capable of truly understanding the suffering of another person. It is only the tree, who through her devotion to the little boy, is able to appreciate his suffering. By loving the boy, she is able to overcome her own suffering and understand that of the boy. In the end, the boy returns, and sits on her stump. This simple act of togetherness more than compensates the tree for all she has given.
"The Giving Tree" is a charming story of human innocence, and agapic love. Certainly idealistic, it is possibly the most beautiful example of the romantic tragedy. I can imagine nothing nobler than to give of myself as fully and as selflessly as the tree gives of herself in this book. Moreover, I believe that anyone who reads this book can see him or herself in the character of the boy, and will find someone in his or her life who plays the role of the tree. The simplicity and wide accessibility of this story strengthens it, and makes the reader appreciate his or her own giving trees. When my grandmother used to finish reading the story, I would always feel a pressing need to thank her, less for having spent fifteen minutes with me on her lap, than simply for loving me.
Book Review: How Not to Get It
Summary: 5 Stars
A response to a general theme of disparaging reviews.
I first read The Giving Tree as an eight- or nine-year-old. I was an above average reader for my age, by no means a prodigy. Yet I like to think I took away what the author intended. Or at least what the author intended for a child to take.
I remember it well. I found the book impacting. It left me vaguely sad and bothered. Not depressed. Not traumatized or in need of a child psychologist. But troubled enough to think. (What a trick to play on a child.)
Agreed, in The Giving Tree, the tree gives too much to serve the needs of the human. But the reader is led to be touched by the tree's loss. You can't help but feel sympathy for the tree, an emotional perspective the author deftly cultivates. And through such feelings, the lessons reveal themselves.
Thematically speaking, as a child I reflected (at my language level at the time), "This person isn't considering the tree's well-being at all. By accepting everything the tree can give, he's depriving the tree of everything it has. Yet the tree feels good about it. The lessons of the tree: it's good to give. And if the tree is happier giving everything, then certainly I can give more without feeling I'm giving too much. The lessons of the man: be careful with others' generosity. Don't take advantage of their desire to help. It can have hurtful consequences, made so apparent by how much the tree is adversely affected." Agreed, there are other levels of irony in this story. But they need not detract from the tale's benefits for a child, based on themes children can detect.
A humble suggestion: don't assume children are so simple. With a story, children can understand characters' behavior not merely as direct example. In this case, for example, young readers aren't led to perceive either the man or the tree as models of ideal behavior. Especially so for the man, as the telling isn't sympathetic to his actions. The story is told from the perspective of the tree, and its loss is clear.
Consider, even many reviewers who rail against the book for its supposed examples also complain that their children were sad after reading it. But doesn't that indicate an understanding that the man's excessive taking, and the tree's overeager generosity, weren't good behavior? The results are precisely what's a little saddening about the book. In other words, your child *gets it*.
The Giving Tree is a tale of uncommon benevolence and wisdom, written and illustrated with artful emotional subtlety. More than most among books for all ages, a story that reaches the head through the heart.