The Definitive Book of Body Language by Barbara Pease, Allan Pease
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Book Reviews of The Definitive Book of Body Language
Book Review: Highly entertaining and useful
Summary: 5 Stars
Body language can convey an enormous amount of information -- it has been said that over eighty-percent of all communication is non-verbal. This husband and wife team has spent the last thirty years researching the science of body language and consulting for speakers, actors, businesspeople, and politicians.
Understanding the principles of body language can be a useful tool for reading an audience, developing rapport with a prospective client, or effectively delivering a message. This book is a wry and lively review of what everyone should know about body language. Numerous examples are issued in the form of celebrity photos, which are analyzed fully. A memorable section is written on the most common gestures of liars, (including facial touching and change of eye contact) with many examples of contemporary politicians as photographed during speeches and testimony.
Most of the content is geared towards businesspeople and at times the book feels a bit like finishing school for MBA's. For example, a full chapter is based on the social hierarchy of seating arrangements for conference tables.
Another chapter is dedicated the do's and don'ts of handshaking, including local variations. Detailed advice is given for dealing with problematic handshakers in what could be described as combat maneuvers for handshake jiu-jitsu. For example, a dominant "palm down" handshake used by assertive CEO's can be countered by a gentle two handed clasp with slight wrist rotation to level the playing field during an initial encounter. Furthermore, for photo opportunities, handshaking toward one's left side almost always communicates a position of greater power and authority.
In a delightful section on how to offend other cultures, regional differences are fully explored, including variations in the use of personal space and the appropriateness of touching in various cultures. Basic hand gestures are explored thoroughly. As an example, the symbol for "Okay" in North America can be interpreted as "worthless" in France or construed as a sexual insult in Turkey.
In addition to being humorous and entertaining, this book is amazingly useful. It deserves a place on the shelf of anyone interested in communicating effectively and working with other people. Highly recommended.
Book Review: Add a new dimension to communication
Summary: 5 Stars
Reviewed by Irene Watson for Reader Views (7/06)
How often do we look at a person, while listening to what they are saying, and wonder if they are telling the truth? Or, how often are we puzzled by the gestures of the person talking because they don't reflect what he or she is saying? Allan and Barbara Pease offer a text-book like version of all the gestures imaginable - many we've done ourselves and didn't realize we were sending mixed messages.
The Pease's included actual photos, many of politicians, illustrations, as well as true-life stories. When they are asked if a person can fake body language they claim that no one can `because the lack of congruence that is likely to occur between the main gestures, the body's micro-signals and the spoken word." The authors also claim that "body language is easier to fake with men than with women because, overall, men aren't good readers of body language."
In this near 400 page book the Pease's explain many gestures. They explain palm power, handshakes, smiles, arm signals, hand and thumb gestures, space invading, and many others. They delve into the most common gestures that we do and see daily, e.g. nod, head shake, picking imaginary lint, stance. An interest to travelers or those dealing with people from other cultures will find the section on "Cultural Differences" most informative. When President Bush was seen holding hands with Saudi Prince Abdullah the gesture made the headlines and much controversy occurred. However, according to the Saudi culture, "if a Saudi man holds another man's hand it's a sign of mutual respect. But don't do it in Australia, Texas or Liverpool, England." Also, as Westerners, and including Europeans, we "blow [our] noses into a handkerchief or tissue while Asians and Japanese spit or snort. Each is appalled by what they see as the other's `disgusting' behavior."
It is obvious that the authors have done their research before compiling all the information into this book. It would be hard to find something missing, or in fact to disagree with them. The book is easy to understand, easy to read, and makes a very good reference book.
Book Review: "Not just what you say. . ."
Summary: 5 Stars
As creatures of many senses, coming from different ethnic, cultural, and social backgrounds, it is a wonder that we can communicate with others as well as we do. For most of our lives, particularly in our educational system, the focus is on the words that we use. Yet studies have shown that the actual spoken words comprise only 7% of the message received by the listener. Tone of voice accounts for 38% of the message with the remainder (55%) of the message resulting from body language. Non-verbal communication drastically alters, modifies or filters the message, often resulting in a discontinuity between what is "said" and what is "heard."
THE DEFINITIVE BOOK OF BODY LANGUAGE, by Allan and Barbara Pease, provides an engaging, informative, and easy-to-read exploration of how we communicate we communicate with each other. Drawing on decades of experience, the authors show how body language originates from both biological and environmental sources. With clear and simple illustrations and photographs, individual elements are isolated and analyzed, and then are placed in a more holistic context.
Topics include the basics of body language, and then move to specific elements including hand and arm movements and gestures, facial expressions, eye signals, leg and body positioning. These areas are examined separately as well is together in general or within a specific cultural context. There are chapters dealing with the body language of power, deceit, emotions, flirtation and sexual overtones - both innate and learned. One of the most helpful chapters on improving communication is in their discussion of mirroring techniques as a means to build rapport.
This is an enlightening book from cover to cover. Its table of contents provide and effective index should the reader wish to explore individual topics or refer back to specific areas of study. The book is invaluable for all who seek to improve their interactions with others. I recommend it highly to those in counseling, ministry, business, and politics - in short, to anyone who must communicate with others (just about everyone).
Book Review: Practival and Entertaining
Summary: 5 Stars
This is a great book - you can open it to any page and find something interesting. Allan and Barbara Pease have presented a book that isolates, examines each component of body language and then explains it with entertaining clarity. This book is full of illustrations, examples and pictures that will help you to more effectively recognize and decode the nonverbal messages of others. Study this book and you will improve your ability to sell, manage, lead, and negotiate. If you want to improve your communication with your spouse, friends, colleagues or members of the opposite sex, this book will give you a leg up.
The book covers a wide range of nonverbal behaviors such as hand gestures, body postures, and eye signals. The section on the thirteen most common gestures is interesting, providing tips on the meaning of different head nods, stances and sitting postures.
If you are looking for tips on how to navigate office politics, you might enjoy their tips on where to sit in meetings, how to use interpersonal space and how to recognize the signals of deceit.
This is by far the most entertaining book on the topic of body language. However, if you are looking for a more scholarly approach to this topic, you might check out Emotions Revealed, Second Edition: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve Communication and Emotional Life by Dr. Paul Ekman, who has done more research on this topic than any other living person. Or you might also try Tonya Reiman's The Power of Body Language: How to Succeed in Every Business and Social Encounter, which has fewer illustrations, but offers more male/female contrasts.
Book Review: Great book!
Summary: 5 Stars
I agree that this THE "definitive" book on body language. I have read many books on the subject---for no other reason than I find it fascinating--and this book is the best, in my opinion.
Pros: All body signal are covered---soup to nuts. They also explain the theory behind each gesture, which really makes you think, "Ahh . . . that makes complete sense." You are taught how to read body movements in clusters, which is quite different than a single gesture. Things are put into context, which I feel is very important to driving home a point. I like the fact that when they explain a certain gesture someone makes, not only do they explain what the gesture means, but they also provide advice for dealing with it. e.g. What you should do when closes their eyes for long "blinks" when talking with you, with their hands on their hips. Additionally, they provide little "tests" for you to conduct with other (unknowing) people to really understand what you are reading is true. Finally, the book does use a lot of examples that are geared toward business relationships.
Cons: I found the section on courtship displays a little dry. I guess it is because I am a middle-aged, married man with kids, and at this point in life care little about courtships. ;-) They also have a section on "props" and what they really mean (glasses, cigarettes, etc.) that I found somewhat boring.
All in all I give this five stars. Regardless if you are new to learning body language or (more importantly) if you are fairly adept and want to learn more---this book is for you!