Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming parent-child relationships from reaction and struggle to freedom, power and joy
by Naomi Aldort
List Price:
Our Price: $8.19
You Save: $9.81 (55%)
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
Category: Book
See more book details and other editions
Book Summary Information
Author: Naomi AldortEdition: Paperback
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 2006-01-01
ISBN: 1887542329
Number of pages: 280
Publisher: Book Publishers Network
Book Reviews of Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming parent-child relationships from reaction and struggle to freedom, power and joy
Book Review: Read the whole thing! Don't give up!
Summary: 5 Stars
I'll admit that I found some of the predictions of negative behavior if you don't meet your child's needs a bit annoying, and I wanted some research to back that up (okay, some of them are obvious, but at times, I wondered if she was trying to scare me into trying the technique!).
As a mother of four (two of them twins) the *apparent* time, energy, attention, and focus required to do some of these steps seemed laughable.
And I thought in the early chapters she was advocating bending over backwards all the time to 'fix' every situation, or that she had no answers for when one child's needs were in direct conflict with another's.
But don't stop reading. I wanted to chuck the book out the window a few times in disgust, but I don't give up easily. (Maybe this has to do with another reviewer's issues with writing ability?)
I'm glad I didn't give up. It takes a less time to do it her way than it takes to handle a power struggle, followed with another power struggle, followed with grief, rage, etc., etc., etc. Much faster to just pay attention, get my own tantrum or issues out of the way mentally, and listen, validate, etc., through the steps. WAY faster to do it this way. Even with four kids, even with twins, even when the problem for one child is that the other child is being themselves.
I also admit I winced at what sounds like 'prettied up' examples, with kids responding so clearly and perfectly to the method. But sure enough, my kids start sounding like that, down to playing out almost word-for-word the 'throwing bike' scenario (drawing up a previous hurt).
I'll caveat that with my second child, this approach would not have worked until we resolved the extreme explosive/inflexible behavior issue (Read: The Explosive Child). But once we had identified and resolved the medical issues, gently and clearly taught him how to de-escalate his mood, and he was open to collaborative problem solving with us, I found that Naomi's book walks us back into 'very sane' parenting.
So even if you get irked easily at parenting books, take my advice - read the whole thing, and give it a try. It works.
More Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming parent-child relationships from reaction and struggle to freedom, power and joy reviews:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
Summary of Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming parent-child relationships from reaction and struggle to freedom, power and joy
Every parent would happily give up ever scolding, punishing or threatening if she only knew how to ensure that her toddler/child/teen would thrive and act responsibly without such painful measures. Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves is the answer to this universal wish. It is not about gentle ways to control a child, but about a way of being and of understanding a child so she/he can be the best of herself, not because she fears you or seeks your approval but because she wants to, of her own free will. Aldort's guidance takes the struggle out of parenting. The book is full of real life stories, often leaving the reader moved to tears or laughter and relieved to discover that there is a kinder way. The SALVE communication formula has been praised for providing a hybrid of The Work of Byron Katie and Nonviolent Communication. It gives parents the tools to move beyond their initial unproductive reaction, to a response that is connecting and empowering to the child and to themselves.The Ph.D. by the author's name in this book is an error. Naomi Aldort has no degree in psychology. Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves is a parenting self-help book with ideas developed by the author based on her own studies and experience. The error will be corrected in future printinngs of the book.
Motherhood Books
Book Subjects
- Arts & Photography
- Biographies & Memoirs
- Business & Investing
- Children's Books
- Comics & Graphic Novels
- Computers & Internet
- Cooking, Food & Wine
- Entertainment
- Gay & Lesbian
- Health, Mind & Body
- History
- Home & Garden
- Horror
- Law
- Literature & Fiction
- Mystery & Thrillers
- Nonfiction
- Outdoors & Nature
- Parenting & Families
- Professional & Technical
- Reference
- Religion & Spirituality
- Romance
- Science
- Science Fiction & Fantasy
- Sports
- Teens
- Travel
Most talked about in Motherhood Books
Mothers of the Bible: A Devotionalby Ann Spangler, Jean E. Syswerda
Zondervan; Published: 2006-03-14; Hardcover; Book
Best price: $2.15
Price in other shops:
Mom's Everything Book for Daughtersby Becky Freeman
Zondervan; Published: 2002-11-01; Paperback; Book
Best price: $5.99
Price in other shops:
A Mother's Touch: The Difference a Mom MakesZondervan; Published: 1998-03; Hardcover; Book
Best price: $0.59
Price in other shops:
Mommy Money: 60 We O.U. Checks from Your Familyby Potter Style
Random House; Potter Style; Published: 2010-04-06; Cards; Book
Best price: $2.74
Price in other shops:
A Mother's Work: How Feminism, the Market, and Policy Shape Family Lifeby Professor Neil Gilbert
Yale University Press; Published: 2008-04-28; Hardcover; Book
Best price: $16.88
Price in other shops:
Village Mothers: Three Generations of Change in Russia and Tataria (Indiana-Michigan Series in Russian & East European Studies)by David L. Ransel
Indiana University Press; Published: 2001-01; Hardcover; Book
Price in other shops:
Complete Idiot's Guide To MOTHERHOOD (The Complete Idiot's Guide)by Deborah Levine Herman
Alpha; Published: 1999; Paperback; Book
Best price: $3.74
Family Mattersby Judith Timson
Harpercollins Canada; Published: 1996-04; Paperback; Book
Best price: $0.99
Price in other shops:
Hello, My Name Is Mommy: The Dysfunctional Girl's Guide to Having, Loving (and Hopefully Not Screwing Up) a Babyby Sheri Lynch
St. Martin's Griffin; Published: 2004-04-07; Paperback; Book
Best price: $1.39
Price in other shops:
In Praise of Stay-at-Home Momsby Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Harper Collins Publishers; Harper; Published: 2009-04-07; Hardcover; Book
Best price: $0.15
Price in other shops:
Similar Books and other products
I Love You Ritualsby Becky A. Bailey
William Morrow Paperbacks; Published: 2000-11-21; Paperback; Book
Best price: $8.49
Price in other shops:
Between Parent and Child: The Bestselling Classic That Revolutionized Parent-Child Communicationby Dr. Haim G. Ginott
Three Rivers Press; Published: 2003-07-22; Paperback; Book
Best price: $7.30
Price in other shops:
Connection Parenting: Parenting Through Connection Instead of Coercion, Through Love Instead of Fear, 2nd Editionby Pam Leo
Wyatt-MacKenzie Publishing; Published: 2007-07-07; Paperback; Book
Best price: $14.40
Price in other shops:
The Continuum Concept: In Search Of Happiness Lost (Classics in Human Development)by Jean Liedloff
Da Capo Press; Published: 1986-01-22; Paperback; Book
Best price: $9.36
Price in other shops:
Respectful Parents, Respectful Kids: 7 Keys to Turn Family Conflict into Cooperationby Sura Hart, Victoria Kindle Hodson
Puddledancer Press; Published: 2006-10-28; Paperback; Book
Best price: $10.91
Price in other shops:
Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peersby Gordon Neufeld, Gabor Mate M.D.
Random House; Ballantine Books; Published: 2006-08-15; Paperback; Book
Best price: $8.98
Price in other shops:
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talkby Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
Baker and Taylor; Harper Perennial; Published: 1999-10-01; Paperback; Book
Best price: $8.74
Price in other shops:
Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kidsby Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross
Baker and Taylor; Ballantine Books; Published: 2010-08-31; Paperback; Book
Best price: $8.42
Price in other shops:
Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reasonby Alfie Kohn
Atria Books; Published: 2006-03-28; Paperback; Book
Best price: $7.86
Price in other shops:
Playful Parentingby Lawrence J. Cohen
Ballantine Books; Published: 2002-04-30; Paperback; Book
Best price: $7.62
Price in other shops: