Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships
by David Schnarch
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Book Summary Information
Author: David SchnarchEdition: Paperback
Published: 1998-05-15
ISBN: 0805058265
Number of pages: 432
Publisher: Holt Paperbacks
Book Reviews of Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships
Book Review: Are you differentiated?
Summary: 5 Stars
If you're not, you need to read this book! The passionate Marriage is an excellent book written in a personable manner with excellent anecdotes that demonstrate the concepts the writer is explaining. Reading this book helped me recognize where I wasn't differentiated and where I needed to do some serious internal work to help myself. It's also helped my marriage a lot, in terms of how my wife and I communicate.
If you're having trouble in your marriage or just want to communicate better and have more intimacy, read this book. It will help both you and your partner(s) connect with each other.
All Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships Customer Reviews
Summary of Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships
People joke that the start of a couple's marriage means the end of their sex life. David Schnarch, a sex therapist praised by Pepper Schwartz, uses epiphany-laden conversations taken directly from his own marriage and the married couples he sees in practice to help readers defy the myth that marriages are necessarily passionless, and instead prove that the longer a couple has been together, the higher the fireworks can fly. It's especially aimed at older couples who, Schnarch says, are self-actualized and therefore better able to handle intimacy than younger partners. "People have difficulty with intimacy because they're supposed to," he says, and goes on in this inspiring book to combine elements of marriage therapy and sex therapy to bring plenty of practical, fresh ideas to the crowd of mostly vapid relationship books. (Note that despite its title, it's for any emotionally committed couple, not just married folks.)Schnarch says that a man is more likely to let a relationship suffer in order to hold on to his sense of self, while a woman is more apt to let her identity suffer to help strengthen it. Schnarch gives explicit tips on how to alter this pattern, an essential step he calls "differentiation." He also explains why compromise isn't always the best route to take when conflicts arise. The couples profiled here deal with the usual suspects: uneven sexual desire and initiation, battles about oral sex, self-image problems, the "boondoggle" of trust (both of one's self and one's partner), and the specter of divorce. Instead of focusing on each client's weaknesses, Schnarch teaches how to find inner strength and resilience that can be used to reaffirm a relationship and reignite sex. William H. Masters of Masters and Johnson fame calls this book "a classic," and no wonder. --Erica Jorgensen
The greatest sexual pleasure in a person's lifetime is possible in one's middle and later years, asserts Dr. David Schnarch, when a mature sense of self has been achieved and genuine intimacy is possible with another person. At his Family Health Center in Colorado Dr. Schnarch works with couples in long-term committed relationships who want to get emotionally and sexually closer. In Passionate Marriage Dr. Schnarch shares what he has learned about how couples can--and must--simultaneously break through the sexual and the emotional blocks that hold them back from total satisfaction. He counsels that every sexual exchange, from kissing to daring erotic behaviors, is a picture of an entire relationship--a reflection of how you and your partner feel about yourselves and each other outside the bedroom. This respectful, erotic, uplifting, and spiritual guide to sexual and emotional fulfillment makes a passionate marriage within the reach of every couple.
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