Life Strategies: Doing What Works, Doing What Matters
by ph.d., Phillip C. Mcgraw
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Book Summary Information
Author: ph.d., Phillip C. McgrawEdition: Paperback
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 2000-01-19
ISBN: 0786884592
Number of pages: 304
Publisher: Hyperion
Book Reviews of Life Strategies: Doing What Works, Doing What Matters
Book Review: If You Don't Want to Do Any REAL Work on Yourself...
Summary: 5 Stars
Don't get this book!! Having said that, this book has helped me to understand more things about myself than any other book I've bought. Nothing like the mamby-pamby books that tell you to get in touch with your *inner child*, Dr. Phil comes straight out and tells you if you don't like your life CHANGE IT. He gives you the tools to look at yourself, and if you really DO look at yourself, and are HONEST with yourself, you can work on the parts of you and your life that bug you.As to the reviewer who commented that Dr. Phil says 'everyone is accountable' and what about rape victims, etc., are you going to tell them they are at fault....NO! You missed the point! On page 65-66, Dr. Phil wrote: (about child victims) "What about things that happened to me as a child? ~~ I realize that certain realities, some of them horribly sick realities, are visited upon us when we are children. I am not suggesting that, as children, we choose all of the events and circumstances in our lives...we are neither RESPONSIBLE (capitals are not Dr. Phils, but mine) or ACCOUNTABLE for being raped, abused, or molested. This is not what I'm saying. What I AM saying to you is that while you may not have had the knowledge or power, as a child, to make certain choices and are therefore not accountable for those events, as an ADULT you DO have the ability to choose your reaction to those childhood events and circumstances...the past is over and the future hasn't happened yet."
Dr. Phil continues: "Is it fair that it happened to you? No. Is it fair that you have to deal with that? No. It is fair that you have to live with it and manage it for the rest of your life? No. Are you nevertheless accountable for how you live with it and manage it? ABSOLUTELY. I suppose that your accountability is both good news and bad news. The bad news is that the burden is on you. The good news is that the choice is yours."
I would think that the same advice applies to adult victims of violence. Dr. Phil's point is whatever you want to change, get it out in the open and deal with it.
As I said, this is a very good book; it's helped me and I will continue to use it. I'm also buying a copy for a family member.
Summary of Life Strategies: Doing What Works, Doing What Matters
Some people spend their lives reacting to what life hands them, while others craft life to fit their goals. Author Phillip C. McGraw, who is a psychologist but describes himself as a strategist, is determined to make sure that his readers are the creators of their lives, not created by their lives. By accepting that you are personally accountable for every element of your life, McGraw says, you can erase the negative "epidemic behaviors" (found in all of American society: denial, false assumptions, inertia, deceptive masking) in your life and reach your goals.Written in a tough-love, sometimes cantankerous tone, this self-help book is not for those looking to explore their inner child or visualize away negative energy. No, this is pull-yourself-up-by-the- bootstraps advice from someone who's done just that. McGraw opens with a scene describing how he helped Oprah Winfrey survive--and win--the 1998 "Mad Cow" lawsuit in Texas, when she was having difficulty coping with the reality of what was happening to her. He helped her face the facts about the lawsuit, after which she was better able to participate in crafting a strategy to win it.McGraw first forces you to take a good hard look at who you are by dissecting your personality. It may be painful to realize that you fall into the "Porcupine" or "Perfecto" or any of the other personality types McGraw delineates, but here it's true that there's no gain without pain, because (Life Law No. 4) "You Can't Change What You Don't Acknowledge." He then describes in depth all 10 "Life Laws"--the rules by which the world plays--that he learned the hard way. Laws such as "You Either Get It, or You Don't," "Life Is Managed; It Is Not Cured," and "You Have to Name It to Claim It" make up the bulk of the book and McGraw's realist philosophy.If you learn and abide by the Life Laws and go on to create a Life Strategy, McGraw claims you will not only know yourself better and eliminate negative behaviors, you will also know how to reach any goal you set for yourself. --Stefanie DurbinAuthor and reader Phillip McGraw is at the forefront of a group of self-help gurus rethinking Americans' decade-plus-long celebration of victimhood. Calling himself a realist, he outlines 10 ways to take responsibility for and change your life. His reading mirrors the style of the weekend motivational seminars he conducts, designed to spark the listener into action. The lively pace crackles with such gems as, "My dad had taught me there are times in life where you just don't want to miss a good chance to shut up." While tape 1's side A bogs down during an account of Oprah Winfrey's beef-industry battles, side B dives quickly into the meat of the audiobook, featuring anecdotes from McGraw's own life and the 10 "Life Laws"--the rules by which McGraw believes the world plays. (Running time: 5 hours, 4 cassettes) --Kimberly Heinrichs
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