 |
It Takes a Worried Man: A Memoir by Brendan Halpin
Book Summary InformationAuthor: Brendan Halpin Edition: Hardcover Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published) Published: 2002-03-05 ISBN: 0375507167 Number of pages: 256 Publisher: Villard
Book Reviews of It Takes a Worried Man: A MemoirBook Review: Wonderful book with a different--and important--perspective Summary: 5 Stars
It Takes A Worried Man is a compelling and fluidly written memoir that uses both humor and hard-edged reality to outstanding effect. I highly recommend it, and not just for those who lives have been directly touched by cancer. I found it to be one of the most arresting books of its kind that I've encountered, precisely because the tone and perspective were so very distinct. I have to take issue with the review posted by the gentleman who feels his "30 years" in the health profession gives him the right to dismiss Halpin's honesty and humor as inappropriately glib and/or somehow sexist. Allow me then to draw on my many years of experience as a woman--one who has watched a good friend battle breast cancer and win as concrete a victory as is possible with this disease. There is nothing "off" about Halpin's tone, or his use of irony to articulate the profound absurdity--and pain--of what life sometimes throws our way. And there is no mistaking who is the real hero in this story--his wife Kristin. Halpin's love and powerful respect for his wife is palpable and tremendously moving. But equally moving is the real and extremely human reaction he has to the overwhelming fear and frustration that confronts both he and his wife on a daily basis. His fear and frustration is not analogous to hers--and how could it be? The author acknowledges his own constant underlying awareness that Kristin is the one who is sick, not him. He cannot shield her from this, and cannot truly ever know what it is she experiences. And this is not always an easy thing to for him to cope with. Sometimes in his struggle to be--simultaneously--a strong husband, a responsible father, an exemplary teacher and a good person, he finds himself faltering. Don't we all. His moments of joy, of anger, of despair, of goofiness or of self-deprecation build on the foundation of his love for his wife--and this is all the stuff of real life. Ultimately, this is not simply a work about a loving, imperfect spouse trying desperately to be a good man in a difficult situation. In a larger sense, this memoir is about the profound demands--and the profound joys--of human companionship. This is really an amazing portrait of what "marriage" means. And in that, it is far more than any simple-minded criticism can dismiss.
Summary of It Takes a Worried Man: A Memoir?When my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, I joked that I couldn?t decide between alcoholism and overeating as a coping strategy. My wife suggested I write about it instead. She is always right. I couldn?t write a cloying, sentimental story of inspiring courage, so instead I wrote what was real to me?fear, lust, annoyance, love, fatigue, resentment, existential terror, horror movies, alcohol, and country music. It?s not pretty, but it is real. I hope you like it.?
This book is a horror story and a comedy, but, most of all, it is a love story. It is the story of what happens to a man who fears that his best friend might leave him forever. Feeling helpless, angry, and scared, Brendan Halpin sat down at his computer late at night or early in the morning and wrote. Pages poured out of him whenever something struck him as funny, whenever he was annoyed with a medical professional or family member, whenever he was terrified, and whenever he couldn?t sleep?in other words, every day. What came out is sometimes painful, sometimes hilarious, but always honest?a journey into the head of a man whose wife is critically ill.
This book will take you to the depths of fear and despair. It will also make you laugh until you feel sick. If that sounds contradictory, well, start reading.
|
 |