I Am America (And So Can You!) by Stephen Colbert
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Book Reviews of I Am America (And So Can You!)
Book Review: Side-splitting, laugh-out-loud hysterical...
Summary: 5 Stars
I read many books in the course of a year, and I tend to rotate between histories, biographies, fiction and mysteries. But every once in a while, I'll read a book that is pure entertainment. Stephen Colbert's I Am America (And So Can You) is side-splitting, laugh-out-loud hysterical!
Colbert is best known for his TV satire on Comedy Central, The Colbert Report. Cobert plays a clueless right-wing pundit who has an opinion on everything--which is never based on fact. The book is divided into three sections, which are then divided into chapters. The chapters cover such hot topics as Sports, Sex & Dating, Homosexuals, Higher Education, Race, The Media, and Science. Cobert gives us his irreverent and uneducated opinion on all things America. "See, at one time, America was pure. Men were men, women were women, and gays were confirmed bachelors." On movies, "once fantastic dreamscapes where cowboys fought Indians and gay men kissed Elizabeth Taylor, became squalid nightmares where cowboys turned tricks and hillbillies kissed Ned Beatty." Colbert includes a whole glassary on science. For Geology, "The last thing I need is a bunch of dust-covered fossil sweepers telling me that the Earth is four billion years old." Also, the author used to be "pro-Fahrenheit" until he found out it was named for a Dutchman. "I don't want my thermometer taking orders from some Amsterdam stoner who got bonged out of his mind one night and started messing around with mercury."
There are also fun things in I Am America. There are two sets of stickers, games, interviews, and the first edition even has a red ribbon bookmark. There are also funny margin notes and footnotes on each page, although I'll "whine" and complain that the print on these could be larger. As a special bonus, he reprints his White House Correspondent's Dinner speech.
Although Colbert plays a dim TV talking head, in real life, he is brilliant, creative and downright funny. If you like The Colbert Report, you'll love I Am America. Even if you don't watch the show, you'll find it a hoot.
Book Review: Quirky--But exactly what one would expect from Stephen Colbert
Summary: 5 Stars
If you know about Stephen Colbert, you'll get a buzz out of this. If you don't, you may be outraged, confused, or God knows what. I got this as a Christmas present, and have found this book hilarious. No sacred cows for Colbert! And that will delight some and anger others.
Hey, I'm a college professor/administrator, and he takes shots at me and my ilk! And I love it! On page 119, he says: "If there's a bigger contributor to left-wing elitist brainwashing than colleges and universities, I'd like to see it. There's an old saying, 'A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.' Which means a lot of knowledge must be a really dangerous thing." On the next page, he notes one of the horrors of college (page 120): "The more you know, the sadder you get."
As he points out at the outset (page vii), "Well, like a lot of other dictators, there is one man's opinion I value above all others. Mine."
His segment on families is outrageous--and funny. He begins by noting that "I'm against children" (page 10). Then, he goes on to lay out a number of laws/tips regarding child raising, among which are items that parents will chuckle over.
What about the elderly? No sacred cow here. He notes that (page 23) "After criminals and babies, seniors are the most coddled segment of the population."
On religion and religious freedom (page 48): "Since the Pilgrims were victims of persecution, some assume they were tolerant. That's just liberal propaganda. Sure they were against persecution...of Pilgrims."
And he reflects on the Olympics, on sports generally, on the media (look at his comments on the major networks on page 154), and science (hilarious).
He concludes by noting (among other things) (page 213): "But make no mistake--my book isn't a monologue; it's a dialogue--a dialogue between me and my opinions, and you've been welcomed to eavesdrop on us."
A funny book. People who accept Colbert's humor will like it. Those who don't? They won't. . . .
Book Review: Inspirational. Motivational. Educational. Truthitational.
Summary: 5 Stars
Get a little inspiration! Just when you may be wondering how much longer you can stand living in a country that airs Fox News 24/7, along comes Stephen Colbert's long awaited diatribe. Reading him rail against homosexuals, liberals and the media is a bit like being back in high school and trying to decide who to vote for on the Student Council. You may realize that while one of the guys is a real douche bag, he just has that certain "it" factor that you know will make HIM win and you want to make sure you can say you voted for him. You want to be on his side and speak HIS language. Stephen Colbert's character on the Colbert Report is exactly that kind of guy; except that while you are shaking his hand (or reading the words) you are thinking how insane it is that there are people out there WHO ACTUALLY *DO* THINK LIKE THIS. You draw from the wellspring of his deep insanity, smiling, nodding, thinking "where will I hide my kids when these people organize?" (If you're smart you'll realize that they already have, they're called the Republican party, and you'll be out there campaigning against them.)
Colbert uses this book to flesh out his character in a way that allows us to feel even more intimately linked to his neo-right wing propaganda cause. He begins with an explanation of how he came to be the Man he is today, how he was shaped into the conservative model of greatness that leads the ColbertNation. Be sure that this is nothing BUT the opinion of Stephen Colbert OF the Colbert Report. If you are a fan of the show, you will LOVE the book, as I did, knowing it has no relation to Stephen Colbert the actor who plays the character on the show. If you have no idea what show I am talking about, you'd be best off buying the book and reading it after watching the show on Comedy Central a few times first. Or better yet, and better for Stephen's pocket book, buy the newly released DVD of the "Best of the Colbert Report" available everywhere. IF you read the book and love it without having ever watched the show, God help us.
Book Review: The TRUTH, the MIGHT, the AMERICAN (a.k.a COLBERT) WAY ! ! !
Summary: 5 Stars
Dear Mr. Colbert,
I have always been a big fan of yours from way back when and have watched (and now read) tirelessly as you have campaigned for the TRUTH: AMERICA AND ITS MEDIA HAVE BEEN TAKEN OVER BY A BUNCH OF BALL-LESS, LIBERAL, EFFETE ELITES!
Obviously the Anti-Republican / Anti-Business / Anti-Old-Testament-God / Anti-Anti-Abortion / Anti-White-Straight-Man Main Stream Media is cooking the books (so to speak) when they came up with their bestseller lists soley to deny you your RIGHTful place as AMERICA'S #1 TOP AUTHOR EVER!
Nowhere is this more evident than when I checked a while back and discovered to my SHOCK that your book was being "allegedly" outsold by two COOKBOOKS (although one, to its credit, did have the word "PRAY" in its title) and another one, get this, on MENOPAUSE. Talk about effete!!!
You, Stephen Colbert, on the other hand, are America's Hero, a ballbearing Man's Man---with your keen intellect, no-nonsense steely gaze, Greek-like chiseled features, glistening steamy man flesh, your pounding.....but I digress.
Moving on.
Now, to get back to your awesome book: some parts are very difficult for me to get through as you use some pretty big words (succulent? stamen?)---another display of your obvious geniusness! But, given at least another 6 months (and a high-school level dictionary) I should finish it. Let the free market speak and let Stephen Colbert speak ! ! !
Forever yours, my Top Alpha Dog,
A fag (OOPS!), I mean, A FaN, a FAN !!!
P.S. Why only 5 stars, Stephen? If it was up to me I'd give you a million, gazillion stars but they wouldn't let me. Better yet, I'd give you the MEGA-rating: one star for each year since the Good Lord saw fit to put our world (and this GREAT COUNTRY: U.S.A #1 !) on the map: around six thousand ! ! !
Book Review: A Life Changing Experience!
Summary: 5 Stars
First, I want to thank Mr. Colbert for saving me from a dim and meaningless life as a book-reading, thought-having, liberal. "I AM AMERICA (And So Can You)" showed me the light (not that I'm a fan of The Enlightenment) and released me from my prison of 'reality' and 'facts.'
Even better, Mr. Colbert taught me that books are useless objects that only make you think. Think of all the money I'll save now that I can stop reading! (Note to Amazon: Maybe you shouldn't carry this book, if too many people read it, it could cut into your profits...)
Evern though the words are only printed on the page, it's like I can hear Stephen Colbert reading them to me in my head. This book is just like watching "The Colbert Report" but I can read it at night without my wife telling me to turn down the volume!
After reading this book, I realized that every other book ever published pales in comparison, so I emptied out all of my bookshelves. (Even my cookbooks.) I piled them all in my front yard. When the garbage men didn't take them away, I couldn't figure out what to do with them. Long story short, my neighbors called the police when the bonfire started to catch their lawns on fire. I say a $500 fine and a scorched lawn is a small price for such a firey (ha!) act of patriotism.
Did you hear that Stephen Colbert is running for President? After reading this book, I'm thinking of moving to South Carolina just so I can vote for him. Twice if I have to.
READ THIS BOOK. In fact, read ONLY this book. Buy multiple copies and resell them to your friends. (Don't give them away - Stephen says "no free rides!") If every person in America would read this book, we'd save our nation from femiliberislamocommunoenvirofascism (and Bears) by the end of the week.
It's up to you, Heros!