How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
by David Richo
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Book Summary Information
Author: David RichoEdition: Paperback
Published: 2002-06-18
ISBN: 1570628122
Number of pages: 240
Publisher: Shambhala
Book Reviews of How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
Book Review: EXACTLY what I was looking for
Summary: 5 Stars
As a psychologist, I KNEW the influence my childhood had had on my relationship choices - the men I chose to be with and the things I chose to do once in the relationship itself. After a final disaster, I had vowed to just be a happy single - and then I found a relationship that is so precious and spiritual that I wanted to do whatever I could to not just preserve it, but nurture it to grow deeper and more powerful.
I went in search of a book that would help me be an adult in my relationship. Almost laughingly, I sought something that would combine my Catholic faith, the tenets of Buddhism that I use in practice and my personal life, and the Jungian philosophies my partner and I both embrace and discuss endlessly. Never, in a thousand years, I thought, would I find a book that would fit all of those bills.
I was delighted to find that in David Richo's book, I found it all. And not just explanations - those I had in abundance - but practical ideas for how to move through and move past old and new hurts, how truly to GIVE in this relationship. My partner and I read from this book at least weekly, and the exercises within help us both think about what we do, why we do it, and how to do it differently.
Dr. Richo's style is positive, normalizing, free of jargon and babble, spiritual, and very, very helpful. THANK YOU, Dr. Richo, for writing this wonderful book. The others are on my shopping list.
Summary of How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this book, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships-one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life: Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control. When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts-what Richo calls the five A's-form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.Interpersonal Relations Books
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