Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth
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Book Reviews of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
Book Review: For those who are serious about raising a child
Summary: 5 Stars
Over a year after picking up Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child I'm writing back to endorse Dr. Weissbluth and his book. I find it interesting to read through the other reviews here and contrast our own experience with the many positive and few negative experiences. For those considering adopting Dr. Weissbluth's methods I offer the following. Our daughter is one of the most happy, well adjusted, and pleasant children I have ever seen. We have received constant compliments since she was very young about how alert she is, as well as how she is always smiling. She has been well ahead of the averages in just about every developmental category (coordination, verbalization, etc.). She has slept regularly through the night during the vast majority of her first year and maintains the schedules outlined in the book. While both my wife and I like to attribute all of this to good genetics, we know a big part of her disposition and development is that she is well rested, and that makes everything else fall into place. This stands in stark contrast to the majority of babies we see who usually appear lethargic in contrast, often looking around with a dull stare without interacting with their surroundings.The past year has not been without challenges. Early on it took a rough three nights to get her sleeping through the night (meaning 8-10 hours of uninterrupted sleep). She did this at eight weeks, and my wife was crying along with her; feeling guilty and hurt but unwilling to turn off the baby monitor. On several occasions when travel or illness interrupted the schedule we had to go through the cycle again, though with each cycle she had an easier time getting back on schedule. The effects of not getting enough sleep are obvious; she gets passive, cranky, and is visibly not herself. At one year of age she has no problem sleeping a straight 12 hours each night (7pm-7am) plus 2 naps each day (1-2 hours each). Again, we have to be conscious of her schedule and plan our activities around those times. Following the schedule is a decision we have made and are fortunate to (for the most part) be able to accommodate. None of this is cruel, harsh, or about abandoning your child. It is about being the adult in the relationship; planning and caring for your child not just for today but for the future. Raising a child is not as simple as reading an instruction manual or cooking from a recipe so expecting exact step by step instructions is not reasonable, but the book has more than enough guidelines to get you there.
We are also fortunate enough to have Dr. Weissbluth as our pediatrician and I can tell you that he is easily the nicest, most gentle and understanding doctor in the world. The dictionary should have his picture next to the word `Grandfather'. Dr. Weissbluth's warmth and understanding have been especially important to my wife who has been the one to really put his teachings to the test.
One last note - we get the occasional "you are really lucky" comment. We don't buy it for a minute. Our daughter is a terrific little girl because we consciously work at it and follow the guidelines in the book. The last thing any new parent needs is yet another piece of advice (you get it from everyone, right?), but do yourself a favor and check out this book.
Book Review: I'm here to purchase yet ANOTHER copy for a friend!
Summary: 5 Stars
I first gave my opinion on this book when my daughter was 8 weeks old and thankfully sleeping very well (we had been following Dr.W's advice for 2 weeks). I guess we are lucky we began early because we never really allowed a sleep problem to develop. Our, then, 6 week old woke us up all night - but she was 6 weeks old! I was more interested in preventing a sleep problem in the future and DID NOT want a child that cried herself to sleep every night because her parents continuing to go to her "keyed her up". Yes, we all needed our sleep but I never would have continued to let her cry night after night if this advice was not working. BUT IT DID WORK! Within the first week and on through the first teeth (another story) she went to bed at 7pm, woke at 2-3am for a bottle, and then usually slept until 8am. Occassionally, she would wake and take a bottle at 6am.I am writing again now that my daughter is 9 months old! She sleeps from 7pm to 6:30am, takes a bottle and goes back to sleep until 8am. She naps at 10:00am and 1:00pm (she gave up her late afternoon nap at around 7 months). We are "lucky to have such a good sleeper" people say and keep in mind I also got a lot of harrassment about "my strict schedule". But I was not strict, my daughter was not crying, I was protecting her right to sleep at normal nap times and bedtime. Believe me, this is a sacrifice not a selfish act. Sure it would be easier to tote her around all day at my convenience and toss her into bed whenever the relatives are finished passing her around but I try to keep a schedule for her instead. She had and still has a positive attitude about her crib and her sleep. When she is tired, she holds her "Lovie" and I will take her to her bed where she rolls onto her side and goes to sleep.
I have just finished reading several of the 1 star reviews regarding this book and I just want to say again that it is a MUST READ! Use it if you can and trust your own insticts as well. It is not a legal document - there is no place to sign away your parental rights at the end. If you are not able to use your own judgement you will be forever frustrated as a parent.
Once,when my daughter was about 3 months old, she had gone to bed at 7pm (as usual) and woke fussing at 8pm ( this was unusual). Of course, I went to her - and found the cat was in her bed! Another time I followed my insticts to find she was indeed sick. There are exceptions. But, most recently, I have been pulling out the book again because she has taken to throwing her pacifier to the bedroom door at night(we hear it hit the hardwood floor and were going back in to give it to her.) Now she hollers MaMa or DaDa for us to come back in and give it to her. She knows exactly what she is doing and although we are proud of her ingenious behavior to keep us playing we don't want an ongoing bedtime problem. It may be time to eliminate the "binky"! :-) Or maybe a slightly later bedtime. We are still working out the kinks on this issue...but
I highly recommend this book. We have a wonderful, happy, well rested daughter. She trusts us, loves us, and is very secure. She is VERY much loved and we love this book! Good luck and happy sleeping!
Book Review: Thanks to This Book, I Have the Happiest Baby!
Summary: 5 Stars
My daughter is now 5 months old and could not be a happier baby. She wakes up smiling every morning. She sleeps 12 hours a night (6 pm - 6 am), waking up only once to eat, if at all. I put her to bed wide eyed and smiling and she falls asleep within minutes for the rest of the night.
She takes three naps a day that last at least an hour. Sometimes her afternoon nap lasts 2.5 hours!
Two months ago this same baby was crying everyday for 1.5 - 2 hours between the hours of 5 and 7 pm. She was inconsolable. My poor husband would come home from work every day to a screaming baby. We would hold her, rock her, give her gas drops, put her in the Bjorn, take her outside - ANYTHING to try to calm her down. Some days I was convinced it was gas, other days I was convinced it was because I ate something that disagreed with her. I felt so bad for her. She would cry until she couldn't cry anymore.
A friend loaned me this book and I realized that it wasn't anything I ate and it wasn't gas - my baby was TIRED!! She wasn't napping more than 30 minutes at a time and I was putting her to bed at 9 pm. I read Dr. Weissbluth's book and learned about a baby's sleep needs in general. It was hard letting her cry and I understand why people can't do it and think it's cruel. But, Dr. Weissbluth explains that if your baby is not hungry, crying during a time when they should sleep is merely protest crying. They are communicating that they do not want to and cannot sleep. I started with consoling her without picking her up by rubbing her and talking to her. I did not want her to associate crying with being picked up. I then let her cry for small increments and then up to 30/40 minutes max. It was one of the hardest things for me. But I knew she was not hurt, I knew she was not hungry and she needed to learn how to sleep on her own. She was not crying from pain, but crying because she was trying to communicate with me that she did not want to sleep. I knew she needed to sleep and now that she knows how to do so on her own, it was one of the greatest things I have ever taught my daughter. Now, if something wakes her up (the dog barking, a phone ringing), she usually goes back to sleep until she is rested. If she wakes up crying, I know she isn't fully rested and I sooth her back to sleep. I have stayed home a lot over the last couple of months to respect her need to sleep every 1.5 hours. I have felt couped up at time because I keep our "exception" days few and far between, but it's been worth it. If we have an "exception" day where she misses a nap or goes to bed late, she recovers quickly. She is so happy, alert and calm. People always comment on her pleasant disposition. I know the fact that she has great sleep habits now will pay off when she is a toddler and even later in life.
I don't know what I would have done without this book. I would still have an overtired cranky baby on my hands and have no idea why!! I'd still be constantly giving her gas drops!!!
Dr. Weissbluth's suggestions are not rigid - they are flexible, they make sense, AND THEY WORK!!!
Book Review: SO WORTH giving a chance!
Summary: 5 Stars
My first born is 12 weeks, and has become a great sleeper. I credit that to the advice I learned so far from this book. Many reviewers say things that simply are not true. For example the author does NOT always stress cry-it-out. There are several sleep training strategies he suggests, based on the temperament of your baby: easy, common fussiness, extreme fussiness/colic - along with what the parents are comfortable with. ONE of these options is extinction or letting them cry (from 8-16 weeks, only if they are easy or common fussiness). But there are also strategies of controlled crying, or checking and consoling. Dr. Weissbluth says MANY times in this book, when a baby is in the first 6-8 weeks DO NOT let them cry! He also states in big bold letters "Sleep training does not equal cry it out". So many of these harsh reviews are the result of a hasty read, as they do not align with what the book actually says. I think you'd do yourself a favor to give this a chance and not go by these reviews, or you could miss out on some very valuable information.
Personally, I do not recommend reading this cover to cover, especially if your baby is already born and you're crunched for time. Explore the table of contents, and start with what you need to know NOW, and go from there. I went straight to page 195 when I began this book, to read about the first four weeks when my baby was first born. I was a brand new mom and just needed to get an idea of what to expect that week. I was ready and had braced myself for that 5-6 week "peak fussiness" that I had read about - and then it arrived, right on time! Don't read about colicky babies if you have a baby with common fussiness, or if you should be so lucky, a very easy baby. I bypassed that and hope I will NEVER have to go there! :) You have to take it in sections to really get the most of it. I read some ages ahead of time, and then re-read them when my baby got to that age. I got something new out of it each time I reviewed the information and was always amazed at how much what I read matched my child's development and temperament at each age. I am still not through this book because my son is only 12 weeks old. I have a long way to go before I've gotten all I will get from this book.
Don't take my word for it. My baby boy is living proof that instilling healthy sleep habits based on these methods works. Last night I put him down at 8:30 and he slept almost 8 hours straight before a quick feeding, and then back to bed for 4 more hours. As a matter of fact, because we followed Dr W's advice from very early on, so far we really haven't had to deal with "crying it out". Our son is used to being put down drowsy but awake, usually (and it's impossible to ALWAYS do this) before he has crossed the threshold from drowsy to overtired - after 2 hours of wakefulness. So when our bedtime routine begins at 7-7:30pm, by 8:30 he is drowsy and ready to be put down. Sometimes he will fuss a little, but it's nothing a few soothing pats and replacement of his pacifier won't solve.
Give it a chance! You may be very glad you did.
Book Review: Don't wait till the baby is born - read it now!
Summary: 5 Stars
I read this book when my daughter was 11 weeks old. She would rarely nap and was erratic in her bedtime sleeping - I thought I just had a baby that would not sleep or nap. I read the book and decided to try the methods simply to disprove them. THEY WORKED! When he said to put the baby down every two hours after being awake I laughed thinking it would never work - she simply was not tired then. I put her down and off she went to sleep like clockwork ... this went on for months until she changed her nap schedule on her own about 6 months old and now takes 2 gresat naps a day. She smailes when she sees her crib and knows its nap time.Being well rested makes her such a happy baby. i have also noticed that she has a long attention span and is not easily frustrated like babies of friends who don't have their children on sleep schedules.
the biggest compliant I have seen in the reviews is that it is horrible to let your baby cry. We have had a few crying episodes but they have been few and far between and are always my fault for letting her get overtired which makes it hard for her to calm herself down and go to sleep. As a mother I know her cries and I can tell when she is just mad because she would like to stay up and play, when she is just whining or when there is something wrong - a burp or something uncomfortable on her clothes, etc. Obviously I go to her when I know there is a problem as any mother would. The parents out there who think it's so bad to let the baby cry... I guess you will let the baby play with a knife because they want to and will cry if you take it away. I guess you also will not put the baby into the car seat because the baby doesn't want to be strapped in. It's absurbright? but the thought that you as a parent are not allowed to let them cry a little in order to do what is best for them like sit in the car seat or not chew things that are dangerous, etc. (or be well rested) is a joke. Do you not let your baby get shots because it will hurt?
Dr. Weissbluth empowers parents to do what is best for their baby. He gives you the knowledge and agenda to put them on the road to being a healty sleeper. WIthout this guidence I think it would be hard to let the baby cry. This gives you step by step instructions and gives you constant positive affirmations that you are doing the right thing for your baby. we all know it is easier to just go pick up the baby and rock her to sleep rather then let her cry and figure out ON HER OWN how to learn to fall asleep - which is a skill as those of us know who have had babies that could not sleep on their own.
Don't listen to those who rip this book apart because they are not secure enough parents to do what's in the best interest of their children. As strong, educated parents we all know the importance of giving our children the tools to learn skills on their own - this skill happens to be sleeping. your baby will wake up as mine does - cooing and talking and jabbering away in her crib because she is well rested and happy! kudos to Dr. Weissbluth!