Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious
by Debi Pearl
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Book Summary Information
Author: Debi PearlEdition: Paperback
Audio: English (Unknown); English (Original Language); English (Published)
Published: 2004-12-01
ISBN: 1892112604
Number of pages: 297
Publisher: No Greater Joy Ministries
Book Reviews of Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious
Book Review: IGNORE the two reveiws by Piedmont Mom and Kara Barnette, & instead refer to the one by Christie A. "Mother of Five Girls"
Summary: 5 Stars
There are always those who have something critical to say about something, no matter how true or helpful it may be, especially feministic women, I've noticed. I am unbelievably irked by the two reveiws on the front page by Piedmont Mom and Kara Barnette "Kara Barnette". They seem like they are written by feminists who can barely read. I can refute many of their key arguments against reading this book right away by saying that Debi CLEARLY says somewhere near the beginning that this is NOT meant to address the responsibility of the husband; that is done by Micheal on how to love their wives, etc, I believe. This is a book for WOMEN on what their roles should look like. She IS NOT denying the sinfulness of husbands, and even states this in one (or more?) of her replies to letters from the wives, but rather chooses to focus on how the wife should proceed to act and what her attitude should be NO MATTER WHAT. I can think of no better example of this, than that of Christ who was literally beaten, etc, yet did not fight back (I am NOT condoning spousal abuse, for those who may want to try to twist this statment) and instead replied with love and forgiveness and a meek spirit. There are a couple things that I read that made me go, "Ok." I think I would recommend some things differently, but nothing that jumped out at me and made me go, "that's not Biblical and this women is psyco." What could be more "Biblical" than to have a happy spirit?! Please, naysayers. Pick on something that actually has faults! I felt like Debi gave some very ungrateful women a dose of reality and encourages us to, "get over it" and make a change for the better. I can totally see myself to some degree in some of the stories and I appreciated the honesty. While not exactly tactful, it was like a good friend telling me to shape up, as only a good frind can.
In response to Kara Barnette "Kara Barnette": Your review takes a LOT of things out of context. The way you wrote them would make me doubtful about reading the book myself. When you bother to read these things in context, as well as the whole story, they will make sense and you will get the whole picture. Don't listen to Kara!
In regards to her statement about Debi "scaring readers with a missionary couple story", she was referring to being cautious. I have a good friend to whom this same thing almost happened. God miraculously prevented it by a crazy string of events, but it was THAT close to occuring. WE MOTHERS CAN NOT BE TOO CAREFUL! This is what Debi is emphasising. If the mom in the story had been there, this would not have happened, right? Like it or not, our place is with our families if we have chosen (or not) to have a family. Again, one can make their own judgment and choice. Debi's book is not the Bible! It IS one of very good judgment and ideals, however.
In my case, I use a babysitter because my husband has asked me to go to school to become an RN to help with finances. We got married very young and had children young, all without having college degrees. In our situation, this is what we have chosen to do, but because we felt we need to. While this is not what I would like to do, I am happy to help out and I have chosen to find a good family with whom to place my child. I have also worked out my current schedule so that it does not have to be often (only one morning a week), so that my son can be with me as much as possible. There is always a risk, but let God lead you!
Another thing, she does NOT tell readers not to use birth control. She is actaully addressing a woman who refused to use it! She kept getting pregnant, instead of using birth control ("that which doesn't kill a fertilized egg," recommends Debi), putting more and more strain on her husband to provide for their large family (SEVEN kids). Debi lists several ways to prevent getting pregnant and in this context, was telling the woman (my summary here) that she SHOULD HAVE used it. TRY READING THE STORY CORRECTLY, Kara!
Even if she did tell us not to use birth control, we are intellegent women! We do not need to obey everything we read by mere people, do we?! Each woman can make her own decision based on what God has convicted them of and that is all God has required of us. Not to follow what other PEOPLE are telling us, but what He tells us in the Bible and in our hearts.
I found the review by Christie A. "Mother of Five Girls" to be very in line with how the book really is.
For those wondering if her principles are truely lived out in her own life, I can attest to it. Try to follow along *smile*: My best friend is the sister of the man that married the Pearls' daughter, Rebekah. My friend lived with the Pearl family (for a year?) before their daughter married my friend's brother. She was the one to recommend this book to me, and one of my first questions was, "Does she really live this out, is her husband happy, does this work?" She said that as far as she could see, they never fought and she always practiced what she preaches. I thought this was great to know because I don't want to waste my time reading and trying to apply something that the author doesn't even stick with, you know?
It is hard material to comprehend, let alone apply to one's life, but don't give up! The FIRST day I changed my attitude to one of appreciation and thankfulness, my husband was thrilled! He responded with kindness, care, and love. We generally have a good marriage, but this took it beyond. The trouble I am left with is having a good and thankful spirit 24/7, but I believe it is something I just have to buckle down and choose to do everyday. And we are not alone! God will be there to help us and comfort us if/when our husbands do not yet respond in love, etc. It takes time! The Bible tells of women patiently winning their husbands to God through their attitudes, and I belive that this also applies to us. We can win them to ourselves if we undo the damage our bad, unthankful attitudes have caused by days, weeks, months, etc of having a GOOD attitude! After all, as Debi said often, we have so much to be thankful for! We may not have a new back porch put up, for example, but we have the warm house, right?
What I have to say is this: Don't listen to the women who twist the stories and advice in this book into something that the author has no intention of saying! It reminds me of "Christians" and others who twist the Bible to suite their own causes. Read the book as an intellegent woman, read others as well, and make informed decisions and choices. Keep on reading, never stop growing and searching for ways to help yourself and your family become what God wants it to be: happy, Godly, and full of love.
A good summary statement seems to be, "Keep everything in perspective. If you CHOOSE to be happy with what you have and where you are, everyone else (in your family) will be happy too." Isn't that what we all want, ultimately?
I recommended it to my mom and will continue to recommend it to the rest of my family and all my girlfriends.
Read it, apply it, and be happy, girls!
More Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious reviews:
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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
Summary of Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious
Somewhere over the passing years and changing culture, women have lost their way. This book is written to lead them back home. Regardless of how you began your marriage or how dark and lonely the path that has brought you to where you are now, I want you to know that it is possible today to have a marriage so good and so fulfilling that it can only be explained as a miracle.Follow Debi Pearl as she takes the wisdom and experience of her own marriage and confirms it with the wisdom of scripture and learn how to be the "help meet" that God created you to be. You will learn to appreciate God's gift of a husband with a thankful heart that produces joy and wisdom in you and your home. Gain a better understanding of who your husband is and how your response to him can make or break your marriage. See the Bible's perspective of obedience and authority and understand how you are joint heirs to the promises of God.
The miracle of a wonderful marriage is like the miracle of birth, God allows you to be an essential contributor to the miracle. Read, enjoy and be blessed as over 330,000 other women already have.
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