Blood Noir (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter) by Laurell K. Hamilton
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Book Reviews of Blood Noir (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter)
Book Review: Anita, vampire hunter, what a laugh
Summary: 1 Stars
I know that I have no one to blame for buying yet another horrible book but myself. I keep hoping Hamilton will finally start writing as she used to, but noooooooo. She is just getting worse. I really believe that Hamilton has mental problems-- have you read her thanks to her husband?
I do agree with another reviewer that her first husband wrote the earlier books. They were interesting and Anita actually did her vampire hunting job ( and had morals ). There were interesting characters, interesting plots and enjoyable to read. Anita also was not trying to take over everyone she meets and make them her " animal to call"
However, her books now have Anita as a person ruled by nothing but sex and more sex. I don't mind sex scenes, but really! She has Anita worse than a "slut".This is really worse than bad porn. There is no way any person could hold up to that much sex at one time, even in bad fiction!! It really boggles the mind that a writer can go from enjoyable writing to this trash.
I wish her first husband would take over the series again and give us the old Anita back! I will keep up with other readers' reviews and if things change I will go back to reading her books.There are still a few strong minded and stubborn readers out there who really hate to give up on a writer, but folks, I really think Hamilton is just too far gone to be able to make it back. Do hope I am wrong, but.
I really can not bring myself to even try to read another of her books, and that is so sad. Things are so ridiculous and horrible now that my eyes are not just tired but exhausted from all the rolling they are doing.
Read her books at your own risk!!
Book Review: I'm uttering my 'safe word.'
Summary: 1 Stars
My safe word is 'ugh.' There. Kindly untie me.
With so many scathing reviews, it is challenging to add anything any reader could possibly consider new knowledge, but I'll try to do so without bloviating.
It opened with the obligatory monster crisis that could be relieved only through Anita yielding to a new sexual dimension. Never seen such co-dependent preternaturals in my whole life, and I used to be an RA in my university's dorms.
The paperback is 417 pages long. As I labored through the initial sexual dilemma, watching chapter after chapter come and go without release, I resolved to note the page at which we finally collapsed in, er, satiation. It was 136: nearly 1/3 of the book. Yes. The first third of the book is the initial monster sexual extravaganza.
As I sensed each new bout of boning coming on, I saw the chapter ending with innuendo, and I besought Thalia and Melpomene: "Please, ancient Muses, let her do like authors do who have actual stories to tell. Please let the actual Sexual Olympics be implied, and get on with the story. A story. Any story." My beseeking was in vain: nope, now it was time to get to the secretious details. Each time.
If that sounds great to you, I have nothing against that. You'll love _Blood Noir_. If several consecutive books of this have you wishing Anita would find a way back to her roots, it ain't happened yet. This is 150 pages of story squeezed into 417 pages. Keep waiting and wishing.
Book Review: All those poor trees!
Summary: 1 Stars
All those poor trees that had to give their lives in order for this craptastic book to be written. I bought the first book in the series very hesitantly but was immedialty sucked in and then bought the remainder of the series thinking...wrongly apparently..that they would all be as great as the first book. Sadly as the series went on...will NOT be buying her newest book Skin Trade!!!...I realized that this crazy lady just wants to write about crazy sex and not much else.
In the first book sex was non-existant and then from there on out, seems Mrs. Hamilton has decided that she wants to write horrible "Romance" books, although the sex scenes are overplayed and quiet honestly getting really old. Where is the old Anita? And what the heck is with this crappy triumvenate where if Anita doesn't have sex other will die....what a really boring plot line...one that has definetly worn itself out maybe 3 books ago.
I can't rememeber which book it was but Anita almost stopped her little sex party with Jason and that other vamp dude who is so pathetic his name is not rememberable but of course Mrs. Hamilton decides nope lets keep this plot going...which is a terrible idea.
So basically this book stinks and looks like the newest one is also a pretty stinky one as well. Read the first few books of the series if you must but leave it at that and just pretend the Anita story is over, as apparently that is what has happened!
Book Review: Save your money
Summary: 1 Stars
This was the first Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter, book I read. Thankfully, I got it through my public library and didn't spend hard earned money on it.
There is absolutely no meat to this story. The excuse of Anita helping out her friend Jason is just a springboard to discuss how difficult it is having to have sex with everyone and everything whenever her beast needs to be fed. Literally, every chapter except the very end, is about how she is a prisoner to sexual demons and how outsiders just don't understand that she's just not a run-of-the-mill whore, but someone who just has to do what's necessary as part woman, part beast(s), federal marshall, etc. All problems are tidily worked out and summed up in the last chapter and everyone lives happily ever after.
If you like dialogue that repeats itself, consists of "yes" she said and "no" he said...and then she said "blah blah" and he said "blah, blah, blah" instead of an author having the imagination to write in an interesting way, then you will love this book.
There is no rich story-telling, no exciting twists and turns, no "see it in your mind" story settings. It's overall boring, including the sex scenes, and that this is a series of books, boggles my mind. If you like the kind of book that makes you wish the story wasn't ending, this one isn't for you.
Book Review: Bloody horrible
Summary: 1 Stars
I have watched LKH's books devolve into nothing but endless whining and endless orgasms. But Blood Noir started out silly and ended up ridiculous. The trip to Jason's hometown to prove to his Father he's heterosexual is a bit like "he that protests too much." The endless ruminating in the hotel after Anita wakes up from a 2 day sexual marathon had me skipping entire pages. Just when I thought Anita was going to hurry up and take a freaking shower, some new and even more ridiculous fight over Anita came up. Why would I care why Jason didn't eat his vegetables? How is showing Anita's scars to Jason's Father relevant? How does a hardcore vampire slayer with 11 (at last count) lovers blush? The personal sexual fantasies of LKH do not make for a believable story line. What woman would want barely 20 year old lovers? I know why men like younger women and believe turnabout is all fair, but to choose these inexperienced, bisexual, barely legal boys over someone with the prowess of Jean Claude? I don't think so. I wish LKH would remember what made her famous and could have stuck to what was working, because it is now broken and permanently crippled.
LKH phrases I am sick to death of..
"Pomme de sang"
"Feed the
Ardeur"
"Brought me"
"Human servant"
"Triumverate"