A Girl's Guide to Vampires
by Katie MacAlister

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Book Reviews of A Girl's Guide to Vampires

Book Review: Katie goes a vampire hunting with hysterical results!!
Summary: 5 Stars

Roxy is a 24-year-old virgin saving herself for Mr. Right and believes in the Moravian Dark Ones (obviously a take off on Best Selling Carpathians from author Christian Feehan). She just spent the night fighting off Mr. Eight-hands Octopus so she is ready for an adventure more to her taste. The other, Joyful, is going steady with Bradley the bore. They welcome Miranda's aid, even though it is with a nervous twitter.

Miranda summons the Goddess to find the perfect mate for her friends in an evening of wine and conjuring a la Witches of Eastwick. And like Eastwick's witches they get more they bargained for. Miranda foretells Roxy will meet her true love before the moon rises and sets again. Joy is ready to giggle until her turn comes. Miranda warns Joy will take a trip. Well duh? This does not impress Joy because Roxy and she are leaving to go to Czech Republic the next day. But when Miranda cautions a child of darkness will cross Joy's path, Joy gets the shivers. Miranda stresses Joy should not be swayed by his dark ways, however, there is another - one who stands in the shadows behind him. He is the one she should fear. Her immortal soul was in the balance, so she must choose wisely.

As the ladies arrive in the Czech Republic, they land smack in the middle of a Goth Festival - nightly till 2 a.m. for a week. Since everyone is dressed as a vampire and vamping around, how is Joy to tell the real Carpathian...hum, I mean Moravian Dark Ones for the imitation one? Is it Dominic in his Chris Lee cape, white makeup and the fake fangs? Or it is the sedate and commanding Raphael St. John?

Roxy, the expert on Dark Ones, swears Raphael, while being definitely attractive, is not a vampire. After all, everyone saw him drinking a beer and every well-versed Moravian expert knows the Dark Ones cannot drink anything but blood until after The Joining. Only, Roxy believes Dominic IS a Dark One while Joy thinks he is nothing but a high-camp ham. Also, she witnesses Raphael dumping his beer in a potted plant when no one was looking!

Dominic is the head of the troop of so-called vamps going to Goth Fairs all over Europe entertaining, and it is clear he is Raphael's boss. Within minutes of first meeting them, Joy and Roxy learn there is a trail of dead women leading from town to town in the wake of the Vampire Troop. Is Dominic or Raphael really a vampire and preying on the women who come to the festivals - just like Roxy and Joy - or is it the strange Tanya who seems too possessive of Dominic and is caught lurking around Roxy and Joy's hotel rooms? Or maybe the quiet Christian who causes Joy to see visions of vampires?

If matters were not getting so heated up - with Dominic suddenly taking an interest in Joy - much to Roxy and especially Tanya's distress - Joy would laugh at everything, equating Dominic's vamp imitation on par with Grandpa of The Munsters. I mean when a man in white makeup and fake fangs threatens to fulfill all your darkest fantasies, no matter how extreme, would you really take him seriously?

Joy feels the sexy, amber-eyes Raphael is the real vampire, though Roxy will hear none of it. Despite this suspicion, Joy cannot help but fall for Raphael - LITERALLY, several times!! So what is a gal to do?? Join Joyful as she clumsily learns the ins and outs of dealing with vampires - fake and real - in this warm and funny tale. Katie Macalister gives you a howling good time - as she always does - lovingly poking fun at the Vampire genre and the fans who devour them.

Coming soon is Sex and the Single Vampire and I cannot wait!!

Summary of A Girl's Guide to Vampires

Joy Randall's Top 5 Tips for Vampire Hunters:

• Location, location, location. Vampires won't be caught dead (ha!) in places like discos, ten-minute lube shops, or Switzerland. Remember, if you wouldn't be there, neither would a bloodsucker.
• Trust your eyes. You know the handsome, annoyingly arrogant, self-assured man in the shadows with long hair and a cleft in his chin? He's your vampire.
• No matter how tempting it might be, do not "accidentally" acquire a paper cut on your finger and suggest your vampire kiss it to make it better.
• Play it cool. Don't offer to accompany your prince of the night on the talk-show circuit, and whatever you do, don't offer him your heart!
• Most of all, remember: being a vampire is nothing to laugh about.

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• Romance > Contemporary
• Fantasy & Futuristic