1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 (123 Magic) by Thomas W. Phelan
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Book Reviews of 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12 (123 Magic)
Book Review: This Works and Works Quickly
Summary: 5 Stars
I'm amazed by some of these negative reviews. I wonder if they read the same book I did or just skipped whole sections. Plus, many of them are clearly operating under the Little Adult Assumption (see chapter 3).
My 4yo took a while before he got it (we started when he was 3), and he tested me every conceivable way. Some days he still does. It worked for my 9yo (8 at the time) in one day. Those who have said it shouldn't be used with older children don't realize that by the time they are 9, they catch on and you barely ever count them. And what does all this order and peace in your home provide? Hours of peaceful playtime to spend with your children during which they can respectfully express their feelings, without attacking or blaming whether positive or negative. My children and I get along better than ever because I am no longer screaming at them and they are clear on what my expectations are.
When you're at your wit's end and you buy this out of desperation, you will read through it in one day and get started, but I highly recommend that you read it again a couple of months later to be sure you don't miss relevant things - like "active listening," discuss discussions and counting attacks, etc., etc.
Happy parenting!
Book Review: Worked like a charm!
Summary: 5 Stars
I bought this for my daughter who has a two kids, ages 2 and 3. The technique worked the very first day. It was amazing. Forget all the psycho babble that's so prevalent in today's parenting advice books. Kids want guidelines. If you don't give them that, clearly and consistently, they'll keep pushing, looking for those boundaries. Book Review: A "must-have" book for all parents
Summary: 5 Stars
As a behavioral health specialist, I have parents use this book with their children. It also helped with my children, especially the one who was using long "discussions" as a way to manipulate situations.
One reviewer gave this book only one star, but seems to confuse what needs to be done in discipline situations with other situations. Effectively stopping inappropriate behavior does not mean that parents do not observe, listen to and talk with their children about their feelings, etc. It does mean that they put firm limits on how their children behave! To fail to do this is to set a child up for a lifetime of problems. These children become those who are upset with police officers who can't understand that they "had to" hurt someone else because they were angry! I do agree with the book recommendations that the unhappy reviewer included. Particularly "How to listen so your children will talk and talk so..." and "Siblings without rivalry." Both FABULOUS books!
I just had to enter in another postive review as I don't think it's fair to expect one little book to cover everything there is to know about something as complicated as parenting. It does a fantastic job of helping parents get control over discipline problems, and even provides solutions to the common ways some children may try to circumvent those efforts.
Book Review: YOU WILL SEE THE CHANGE
Summary: 5 Stars
I ordered the audio tapes and listened to them at work. Once I was finished with the whole series I started counting immediately and after two days my 3 year old knew she wasn't going to be able to get away with her past behavior. I say past bacause we have been using the system for a month and we have a whole new child. It is challenging in front of people and in public but you have to stick to your guns -- my worst challenge is with the grandparents! I highly recommend this product.Book Review: It works if you do it
Summary: 5 Stars
Buy this book if you are tempted to spank - we did and we are so thankful we found this solution instead of having an adult tantrum (spanking). It really makes a difference for our preschool-age girls. Both have very different temperaments (sensitive & dramatic vs. strong-willed and defiant). It seems that the authors anticipated our children's reactions and this helped for us to be prepared and handle appropriately. When our home feels chaotic, it is because we are not applying this simple and effective method that brings order in a firm and loving way. One of our daughters (guess which one:) even started to vomit and urinate in her room but doing time outs in the bathroom helped to remedy this.